Getting shit done is hard. And sometimes it’s very lonely. Making the pledge to get shit done is brave. And it’s even braver if you don’t have anyone really backing you and truly supporting you.
When I see people comment that they lack support it’s generally because of the same mistakes that they have made. Here are my tips for getting the help that you need to get shit done.
1) Let people know that you have a goal. It gives people some context around what you ask of them or what you share. Asking for a babysitter is one thing…asking for a babysitter because it will help you achieve your goal takes it to another level.
2) Know what you need. A part of your goal planning should involve articulating what help you are going to need in order to achieve your goals. Get specific – I need someone to babysit on Tuesday mornings so I can attend a class; I need someone to remind me why I chose this goal; I need someone to make me a coffee at 10am and remind me to go out in the sunshine.
3) Ask for help. This is where most of us have trouble. But people can’t help you if they don’t know that you need help. People are busy and they may not realise that you need help. So don’t waste time being upset that no-one is offering. Be proactive!
4) Don’t get dragged down by negative people. Got someone in your life who just always has to say something negative about your goal? I have people in my life who think nothing of telling me that my goals are not okay – because they don’t like the type of work that I do and don’t feel that it is valuable enough. So I don’t talk about my goals with them. Because…
Just because others can't see the value in your goal doesn't mean that it's not valuable. Image courtesy of Ghostpoet, found on facebook.
5) Find your tribe. Yes there will be negative people around. But there are also a load of supportive ones around too! Find them and spend time with them. My partner often criticises me for spending too much time on facebook…but that’s where my supportive people are. I even started a group specifically as shared support for writers who are doing the 100 day goal program.
6) Remember that not everyone will support you – and that’s okay. Some people just won’t be interested in your goals. That doesn’t make them an arsehole. There are plenty of goals out there that I’m not interested in either. My goals are in a pretty niche area. One that not that many people are truly interested in. I’m happy to talk about my goals all day with people who are interested, but I try to tone it down around people who aren’t. Trust me – There will be enough people who are interested that you won’t need to worry about those who aren’t.
For a lot of us, whether we achieve our goals or not will come down to support. So it’s well worth ensuring that you take a look at what support you need and whether that’s realistic when putting together your goal and your actions.
And now I’m off to assess my support needs and how they can be met.